My heart tends to forget.

It formed a habit of forgetting, believing in alternatives

At times it gets reminded of a feeling

but it can’t make itself think about this specific situation

it feels like an ache in your chest

an unfortunate déjà-vue

you’d rather rip your bladder out than to feel it some more

otherwise the heart preferably rip itself apart

than feeling the same thing over and over again

because well, it forgets the bad side of stories, the after-story and those small fillings we love to oversee.

The connections which form the story to be this story, the plot twist, unforeseen and unreminded.

This leads to falling

again again for the same reason

the reason of being afraid to fear

which is an contradiction itself

That’s why i need to write down every possible situation i can bear myself to write about.

That is why i fell for you

nothing you do or say reminds me of anything i’ve ever seen, ever loved, ever let myself fall for.

You are a new chapter of a book i read to many times

so every time i think about us

my mind confuses the story with whatever it might’ve added